Letting go??

I don't feel like I'm ready to talk about what happened this week. But to be fair to those of you who have been following Silvia's journey, praying with me, it's only fair that you be updated. 

Silvia was sent home permanently Tuesday morning. 

It probably sounds very sudden and all, but the truth of the matter is, she was riding the fence for the last week or two. Talking didn't do a whole lot of good. She knew who she was "listening" to, but couldn't seem to break the bonds that had formed from 14 years of letting her human nature control her. I do still believe her conversion was real, she just hadn't quite gotten the "daily renewing" part yet.  

But the fact that she has walked out of my life, without a good-bye, is still just a little bit too much for me. I have trouble believing that she will be able to continue to listen to the still small voice of God in the tornado that is her life. That becoming a Christian, for her, was something that happened at CICS and would therefore stay at CICS. And I wanted to talk to her one last time and let her know that was not the case and that just because she was not a part of my daily life anymore didn't mean I was going to forget about her and stop praying for her. But I didn't get that chance. And that hurts. But I trust God has a bigger plan for Silvia in this and I will keep clinging to that. He is not limited to our ideas of what will or will not work. (Pat answers that sound good but are REALLY hard to believe right now) 

Please keep praying for Silvia and her mom. She has a hard time finding work to support the two of them if she has to try to corral Silvia and work at the same time. She seemed quite discouraged the last time I talked to her. And pray for me too, that I can put Silvia in His hands and leave her there.